{Note: I’ve edited this to add several more resources at the bottom of the post that I have found to be beneficial in understanding how this movie (and books) are dangerous. Thank you for taking the time to read this and please, feel free to share.}
You probably are wondering why I’m writing about Fifty Shades of Grey. Trust me; it’s not something I want to do. It’s something I have to do. Over a year ago this book hit the bestseller’s list. Several women I know (and a few men) were all into this book. I shared my concerns via Facebook with links about why I would not recommend reading this (or the other two in the series) book. Normally, I would not let things like this bother me (there are worse books in the world to read) because I feel that each person is accountable for what they put in their mind. I’ll let you know my opinion and let you choose. However, this book (and others like it), open wounds deep down inside me and they are not pretty.
I was really hoping when I heard rumors of the book being made into a movie that a producer would not be available (oh yeah, I forgot, it’s Hollywood). Then I started seeing where the actors had been chosen and finally a date for release had been chosen. Sadly, my biggest fears were coming true. The movie version would hit theaters this Valentine’s Day weekend – the weekend of “love.”
I have struggled with writing this post for a couple of weeks. I started seeing articles pop up on my news and magazine apps, Facebook feed, and the Internet. At this time my heart sank. What I was seeing was not good. Then reality hit the other night as I was watching TV and saw the first advertisement for the movie (on public tv no less). My heart broke. I guess I groaned or something because my husband asked me what was wrong. Prayer needed to happen.
I let that simmer for a couple of days but I just can’t get the notion that even though prayer will work that something more than prayer needs to be done. A warning. A personal reason why one should not watch it.
Yes, I am writing about Fifty Shades of Grey to ask you – a woman – Christian or non-Christian – not to watch this movie (or read the books). I’m not saying this just because I don’t like the content or the subject {which I don’t}. I’m saying this because I love you and I would be disobeying God if I didn’t.
I tell you this because of the content/subject of the movie. It’s dangerously dark. No, I have not read the book; I do not need to. I do not have to. Why? Because I lived part of it.
It has taken me years . . . yes, years . . . to deal with this aspect of my life. God and I have had some long conversations and He’s had lots of hard work to do. I cringe at the thought of another woman going through what I have gone through. Although mine was minor in comparison to what the women who are being sex trafficked go through – the mental anguish is still the same and the scars are still there.
I often wonder what my life would be like had I never saw those images or went through that anguish so here I am, writing to you – a fellow woman – to let you know that no good can come out of watching this movie (other others like it or reading books like it.) {Not just because this is another ‘R’ rated moved; but, because it is rated ‘R’ for sexual content, language, and “unusual behavior.”}
However, if you choose to watch this movie, there will be no guilt or shame coming from me. I will still love you the same and will pray for you. If you feel the need to talk, I will be here. I would also ask that you pray for me as well because God still has a lot of work to do in me. I still sin. I still fall. I still make mistakes. However, that part of my life which I caution you about is no more. I wish I could tell you all would be well if you watched the move but I can’t. I know it won’t be. There are images and memories that I still struggle with to this day – things seen and done can never be forgotten. Sure, they can be pushed back and not thought about; but that requires the love and strength of Jesus {and He gives me that}. Although some days, I still need Him more than ever. Nevertheless, He is the True Love that has brought me healing.
He is the True Love that is worth reading about. He is the True Love worth watching a movie about. He is the reason I pay attention to what I do read and watch. Philippians 4:8 says, “Finally, brethren, whatever things are true, whatever things are noble, whatever things are just, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report, if there is any virtue and if there is anything praiseworthy – meditate on these things.”
Sure, I often fail at this; but, there are some things I refuse to let my eyes and heart see. I know that to do so would be damaging to my soul. This movie is one of those things {just the little I see and hear about it makes me sick}. I would be undoing all that God has done. “For God did not call us to be impure, but to live a holy life.” (1 Thessalonians 4:5-7). I am only capable of writing this because of the Love of Jesus and with prayer.
I am grateful for my journey for I have friends who are willing to walk with me – warning me, praying for me, loving me – so please take this post as that. Take this post as a prayer mostly because I know the damage done to me and would not want anyone to go through that. It is my prayer that you will come to know Jesus as the lover of your soul – for Him to show you True Love allowing you to pass that love on to others.
Also, know that I am praying for the projectors not to work and for those who do happen to watch this movie, for their eyes and ears to be blocked. It would break my heart even more to learn that this movie was a stepping stone to the other evils of the world (hard-core pornography, prostitution, etc.) for anyone who watches without me having said something about it.
Thanks for reading this; I know it is long but I pray you will carefully consider what I have said before deciding to watch this movie. And, if you would like to read a true love story between a man and woman, read the Song of Solomon (in the Bible). It’s better than anything Hollywood can produce.
For additional discussions about how Fifty Shades of Grey (and others like it) are damaging, please visit the following links. {I’m praying for you. With love, Lorna}
Exposing Fifty Shades of Grey Podcast, Java with Julie, Authentic Intimacy
Pulling Back the Shades on Fifty Shades of Grey, Sheila Wray Gregoire’s Goodreads Blog
Why I Haven’t Talked about 50 Shades; Hot, Holy & Humorous
The Fifty Shades of Grey Frenzy
Best way for Christian Wives to respond to Fifty Shades of Grey
Follow 2 Serve 
As someone who has read the books with an open mind, my conclusions are that it is poorly written with an over abundance of graphic scenes. That being said however, it is just a book series. Curiosity caused me to read it due to the high number of book sales – in other words, I wanted to see what all the fuss was about. Am I any different for reading them? No. But it allowed me to form a judgement on the story as well as the upcoming movie release. I believe in the rights of people to have choice. If they want to read a book, then who is to stop them. Its one of the joys of the western world, to have freedom to read what we like, what films we wish to see. This is not because I am going against God’s wishes, but purely because I believe it is my right.
Thank you for your comment razorbackwriteraus. I agree – it is our “right” to chose whether or not to watch or read something and I am thankful for that freedom. It is not my intention to tell someone they “can’t” watch or read something. I’m just giving a piece of my heart (and experience) so someone can make an informed decision on whether or not to see this movie. Though it is my prayer they choose not to – it is not up to me to make that decision for them.